My Story

Spellbound

When she was born, her mother, Leonie the Strong looked at her with love in her heart. The love spilled out into her eyes and was upon her face for all to see. Her father Kevin the Unsure, loved her also and showed his love by working hard, for that was all he knew. He worked day and night cooking food for the winged warriors to keep them strong. He wished to spend more time with his family, but felt easier in the presence of the warriors. 

Naming day came. After much consideration, Leonie the Strong decided to call the little one Vicki-ann. A magical two-fold name that means ‘Strong one who can call upon her ancestors for protection’. All was well and Vicki-ann grew big and strong and was happy. She was too young to know about the world around her, and was safe in her own little world. She gained a sister, Jo-anne. The two little girls didn’t know that tragedy was around the corner. Lurking in the shape of a Taniwha: Waipiro.

Their mother had met Waipiro many, many times, and was familiar with his wiles. They were old foes. The girls’ father could not protect the family. Lost in a great sadness and confusion that his family had grown apart, he felt powerless to stop it. Leonie was weak and desperate after another onslaught from Waipiro with no protection. She called upon the help of a wizened old man who promised aid. He took Leonie and her daughters away. She went with him, for she was weary of the battle and did not notice the spell cast upon them. Alas, the wizened old man exacted a cruel price for her devotion. He took their voices.

Vicki-ann grew. As she grew she remained silent and became compliant. Not the compliance of confidence and joy, but the compliance of fear and confusion. She didn’t know she was voiceless. She had half-formed memories of other happier times. Her mother became weaker and weaker. Then a kind and strong man lured Leonie away from the wizened old man, but he soon showed himself to be cruel. He beat her and frightened the children. The cruel one encouraged Waipiro to dull Leonie’s senses. 

This went on for many years. After many failed attempts to gain her freedom, Leonie was finally successful. In a burst of strength that brought her near to death, Leonie took her children and left in the night with nothing. They remained concealed in a convoy till morning. They sought refuge with an ancient clanswoman. She offered them sanctuary, and the little family stayed and regained their strength. 

It was a perilous time for a woman to be on her own with little children. Leonie at last found a kind man to support her and love her and the children. She stayed with him and they continued to fight the Taniwha together. Sometimes they were successful. Sometimes they were not. When they were not successful, there were loud voices and beatings.

Vicki-ann grew into a woman and had many adventures, too many to tell here. She grew strong and resilient, and defeated Waipiro. She met many people. She had lovers. She travelled to find something that would please her, but all the while remained voiceless. She did not know what she wanted, or even what she liked. She had two little ones along the way and brought them up the best way she knew how, trying to make up for the deprivation she felt, determined that they would not know disadvantage.

Then her children were not children any longer, and had little ones of their own. Vicki-ann heard herself whisper, “I want to help others who feel as fearful and confused as I do.”  She was unsure of the path to take, but her steel core gave her the strength to embark upon something new.

Meeting with the wise ones, she learned much about herself and her ancestors. She grew to understand her mother and father, and the fight with Waipiro and how it shaped her. She learned much. Each day was enjoyment to her, even though she grew weary as she grew old. She learned about the spell of voicelessness that had been cast upon her, and it became her mission to break that spell.